Animals carry sense, wisdom, and power. A living creature that feeds on organic matter, naturally focus on sense organs and nervous system. Animal jokes are based on horse, fly snake, cheetah etc. These are the living creature on which the jokes are based and able to respond fast. Animal are loving nature and god gifted to environment.
Foxy Animal Jokes
1. When geese fly
When geese fly in a “V”, why is one side longer?
Because there are more geese on that side
2. Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work
3. What did the turkey say to the chicken?
4. Why do hens lay eggs?
If they dropped them, they’d break
5. Two snakes meet each other…
First snake: I hope I am not poisonous.
Second snake: Why?
First snake: Because I bit my lip!
6. In an elephant’s school, some loafer elephants were hanging around in the canteen. A sexy female elephant passes by the canteen.
Then one of the elephants says: “Look yaar, 3600 – 2400 – 3600!
7. The chicken and the egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed.
The egg mutters “Well I guess that answers that riddle”.
8. A man walks into a shop and sees a cute little dog. He asks the shopkeeper “Does your dog bite?”The shopkeeper says, “No, my dog does not bite.”
The man tries to pet the dog and the dog bites him. “Ouch!” He says, “I thought you said your dog does not bite!”
The shopkeeper replies, “That is not my dog!”
9. Daughter told to her mother, “Right now I have seen a healthy white big cat went out from our kitchen”
Mother told,” It is good sign and fortune to see a white big cat.”
Daughter replied, “Yes fortune is that it has eaten all of your foods.”
10. Ek bar ek chitti ne Hathani ke Kan mein kuch kaha toh hathni behos ho gayi.
Phir kisine chitti se pucha ke tune kya kaha?
Chitti Boli: Maine itna hi kaha ke “Main tumhare bacche ki maa banne wali hoon!”
11. Where do mice park their boats?
At the hickory dickory dock.
12. Where did the sheep go on vacation?
13. What do you call a thieving alligator?
14. What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock and bow-wow?
A watch dog
15. What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?
16. What is a cheetah’s favourite food?
January 3, 2014 No Comments
Akbar Birbal stories are a basic part of rich Indian inheritance. These are the most popular stories among all age
groups that encourage moral values and qualities. This collection of stories is based on the relationship shared between Akbar and Birbal. Akbar was an uneducated king who ruled the Mughal Empire between 1542 and 1605 and Birbal was one among the educated people whom Akbar had invited to his court. After the two met at the court they exchanged knowledge and sentiments with each other that were later compiled to attractive stories that imparted a moral.
Akbar Birbal is a series of Hindi mobisodes launched by Rajshri on the Rajshri.com portal on July 1, 2008. Mobisodes of Akbar Birbal Remixed are available in SMS, MMS, video and audio formats.
The show will next be made available on the TV, home video and FM Radio. Akbar Birbal stories are absolutely the most popular stories among people of all age groups. These stories are full of wit, humor and cleverness.
Story of intelligence
The Three Questions – Akbar & Birbal
King Akbar was very fond of Birbal. This made a certain noble very jealous. Now this courtier always wanted to be chief minister, but this was not possible as Birbal filled that position. One day Akbar praised Birbal in front of the aristocrat. This made the courtier very angry and he said that the king praised Birbal unjustly and if Birbal could answer three of his questions, he would accept the fact that Birbal was intelligent. Akbar always wanting to test Birbals wit readily agreed.
The three questions were
1. How many stars are there in the sky?
2. Where is the centre of the Earth and
3. How many men and how many women are there in the world.
Instantly Akbar asked Birbal the three questions and informed him that if he could not answer them, he would have to leave as chief minister.
To answer the first question, Birbal brought a hairy sheep and said, “There are as many stars in the sky as there is hair on the sheep’s body. My friend the noble is welcome to count them if he likes.”
To answer the second question, Birbal drew a couple of lines on the floor and bore an iron rod in it and said, “this is the centre of the Earth, the courtier may measure it himself if he has any doubts.”
In answer to the third question, Birbal said, “Counting the exact number of men and women in the world would be a problem as there are some specimens like our courtier friend here who cannot easily be classified as either. Therefore if all people like him are killed, then and only then can one count the exact number.”
Moral: There is Always a Way.
The Wicked Barber’s Plight – Akbar & Birbal
Birbal was not only ruler Akbar’s favourite minister but also a minister dearly loved by most of the masses, because of his ready wit and understanding. People used to come to him from far and wide for advice on personal matters too. There was a group of ministers that were jealous of his growing popularity and disliked him powerfully. They supposedly showered him with honour and compliments, but on the inside they began to hatch a plot to kill him.
One day they approached the king’s barber with a plan. As the barber was very close to the king, they asked him to help them get rid of Birbal permanently. And of course, they promised him a huge sum of money in return. The wicked barber readily agreed.
The next time the king required his services, the barber started a conversation about the emperor’s father who he also used to serve. He sang praises of his fine, silky-smooth hair. And then as an afterthought he asked the king that as he was enjoying such great prosperity, had he made an attempt to do anything for the welfare of his ancestors?
The king was furious at such impertinent stupidity and told the barber that it was not possible to do anything because they were already dead. The barber mentioned that he knew of a magician who could come of help. The conjuror could send a person up to heaven to enquire about his father’s welfare. But of course this person would have to be chosen carefully; he would have to be intelligent enough to follow the magician’s instructions as well as make on-the-spot decisions. He must be wise, intelligent and responsible. The barber then suggested the best person for the job – the wisest of all ministers, Birbal.
The king was much energized about hearing from his dead father and asked the barber to go ahead and make the activities immediately. He asked him what was needed to be done. The barber explained that they would take Birbal in a procession to the burial grounds and light a pyre. The magician would then chant some ‘mantras’ as Birbal would ascend to the heavens through the smoke. The chanting would help protect Birbal from the fire.
The king happily informed Birbal of this plan. Birbal said that he thought it a brilliant idea and wanted to know the brain behind it. When learning that it was the barber’s idea, he agreed to go to heaven on condition that he be given a large sum of money for the long journey as well as one month’s time to settle his family so that they had no trouble while he was gone. The king agreed to both conditions.
In the duration of this month, he got a few trustworthy men to build a tunnel from the funeral grounds to his house. And on the day of the ascension, after the pyre had been lit, Birbal escaped through the concealed door of the tunnel. He disappeared in to his house where he hid for a few months while his hair and beard grew long and unruly.
In the meantime his enemies were rejoicing as they thought that they had seen the last of Birbal. Then one day after many, many months Birbal arrived at the palace with news of the king’s father. The king was extremely pleased to see him and ready with a barrage of questions. Birbal told the king that his father was in the best of spirits and had been provided with all the comforts except one.
The king wanted to know what was lacking because now he thought he had found a way to send things and people to heaven. Birbal answered that there were no barbers in heaven, which is why even he was forced to grow his own beard. He said that his father had asked for a good barber.
So the king decided to send his own barber to serve his father in heaven. He called both the barber and the magician to prepare to send him to heaven. The barber could say absolutely nothing in his own defence as he was caught in his own trap. And once the pyre was lit he died on the spot.
Moral: Nobody dared to conspire against Birbal again.
One fine day, Akbar lost his ring. When Birbal arrived in the court, Akbar told him “I have lost my ring. My father had given it to me as a gift. Please help me find it.” Birbal said “do not worry your Majesty, I will find your ring right now.”
He said, “Your Majesty the ring is here in this court itself; it is with one of the courtier. The courtier who has a straw in his beard has your ring.” The courtier who had the emperor’s ring was shocked and immediately moved his hand over his beard. Birbal noticed this act of the courtier. He immediately pointed towards the courtier and said, “Please search this man. He has the emperor’s ring.”
Akbar could not understand how Birbal had managed to find the ring. Birbal then told Akbar that a guilty person is always scared.
Moral: A Guilty Conscience needs No Accuser.
Birbal caught the Thief
A rich merchant’s house was robbed. The merchant assumed that the thief was one of his servants. So he went to Birbal and mentioned the event. Birbal went to his house and assembled all of his servants and asked that who stole the merchant’s things. Everybody denied.
Birbal thought for a moment, then gave a stick of equal length to all the servants of the merchant and said to them that the stick of the real thief will be longer by two inches tomorrow. All the servants should be present here again tomorrow with heir sticks.
All the servants went to their homes and gathered again at the same place the next day. Birbal asked them to show him their sticks. One of the servants had his stick shorter by two inches. Birbal said, “This is your thief, merchant.”
Later the merchant asked Birbal, “How did you catch him?” Birbal said, “The thief had already cut his stick short by two inches in the night fearing that his stick will be longer by two inches by morning.”
Moral: Truth will always prevail.
January 3, 2014 No Comments