Man: I need a holiday, the pressure is beginning to tell on me.
Friend: Why, what’s the matter?
Man: Yesterday, when I got back to my office from having lunch, I’d left a notice on the door saving “Back in half an hour”, so I sat and waited for myself!

Arvind: How do you manage to catch fish at night?
Tanuj: Easy, I use glow-worms for bait.